You can’t have a conversation if you don’t notice.
Noticing the other is a very important aspect of a conversation, yet usually neglected – is the other interested? Is she/he concerned about something else?
The Meisner Technique is a good exercise to practice noticing.
Noticing requires effort, but one should judge which cost is higher in a given situation: the cost of noticing or the cost of not noticing.
Fighting and dancing
One must also decide when to fight and when to dance, meaning…
· Fighting: arguing against someone
· Dancing: building on someone’s point
Usually group decisions are better than individual ones on average.
When working in groups, we contribute with our spotlight and also get the spotlight of others. One should assess whether the group is getting too much or too little of his spotlight.
It is important to be aware of the role that the reconstructive memory plays on our interpretations of facts.
- The Meisner Technique: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meisner_technique
- Reconstructive memory: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reconstructive_memory